Thursday, October 30, 2008

A Looking Glass

I'm taken,
swept by the separation
of a pane of glass
as though permission's granted,
not having to ask

to watch you
and think of you
and wonder what's to pass
if I step beyond
the reflection
and make ask you out the task

but at last lights flicker,
switching off for the night
and chairs empty resigns me
I should have earlier strived
taken up with courage,
boarded up with bold
when I had the time

cognitive ability lies
as self-preservation
before abating belies


Wednesday, October 29, 2008

The Prisoner Of Cynicism

your open mind let's my token words as a breeze brush in
in a gush flooding and filling, in a seethe the space up within
and it's switching on my dithered interest; the juxtaposition
of your obvious contemplation marked in the words, "I dunno"

so fitting is it your timing now reminding me what love is
that I'm bothered by myself finding such assurance like this
that excitement is best paired between two kindred spirits
and feeling alone is less overrated, so long's you harbor hope

denial's the curse placed upon instinct in absence of relation
like surprise suffices justification of judgment precluding investigation
and ball and chain becomes
your weight to carry in Cynicism's prison
you'll rest on Skepticism's laurels unaware what you make them bare
only thins them


Monday, October 27, 2008

Hold Steady, Love

what our love is known for comes in waves and gathers
at the shore front and laps at our feet making out patterns
with the shells and seaweed and driftwood aligning tracks

that sit in the sand a little while then away they wash back
and taken as a boat by the tide you and I seem drifting forever
upon an ocean with motion towards endless storms' tether

but not break or splinter will we for anchored strong and fast
to the sea's floor and gash with claws the wind will till then pass
leaving us weathered and seasick but on knees in thanks

hoisted sail to the gusts to carry us further on by our flanks


Saturday, October 25, 2008

You're Growing Hope And It Sells

I'm drawn in and of to you pulled through your mind's eye for me
the way I'm transparent you find easily more than most see
drinking on Fitzroy street you've been the first lacking fear to question
noting quick and blatant that I sear myself because of what I less mention

struck slightly embarrassed at your insight and requiting interest of haste
I paused for a second not quite sure how to respond or keep face
but I chuckled inside my head much more aware for your saying
and it became me an inspiration that I've long been incorrectly aiming

your philosophies on love and relations are romance by definition
and on a pedestal you hold high marriage, as if by wise premonition
you're let aware you're just waiting for what's inevitably due
with a sense of conviction so contagious it may's well be true

see my mind shadows my heart and won't be shaken or torn
though with a sense of longing I yearn my conscience be reborn
and if to do it all over I'd be hard pressed to say I crave knowing
because my crime is over thinking yet my only sure bestowing

I love the phrase you and I mirrors for each other leave exposed
not only reflections but angles and aspects unseen and unknown
when I look at your words italicised in your eyes gleaming hope
I bury my harrowed thoughts in the soil of yours waiting to grow

an evolution is underway creeping along my bones out my mouth
down my nose, past my ears and it's soon enough going to surround
I can feel the air thicker for more intimate desire breathing all around
drowning the sounds of sad love with trumpets exclaiming; wait, be found


Wednesday, October 22, 2008

Your October Coat

I never told you the extent to which, I fell in love with your October coat
I couldn't mention of or hint at what I felt as the sun melted through the snow
I wouldn't allude how I let it rope me in as Winter quickly passed into spring
and dare not venture beyond friends for fear of what haste and impatience brings

that long jacket bathed you in grey but not bleak for your cashmere eyes
glowed a pastel amber when rays of sun streaked crimson through a lazy sunrise
if procrastination were profession you used to be an excuse to misuse my time
we were perfect in our learning of what for wanting does to make you smile

now what wonders left for what one does know about how the heart abnegates
through my skin it permeates to my skeleton abrading sinew till for pain I abdicate
your coat tails lifted brisk to the timely wind the new summer afternoon looming
and letting go your rope the room in my head I made home for you disappeared just as soon



Tuesday, October 21, 2008

Priorities

zippers on her back pockets
what a pair of jeans to admire
but what hides beneath
worth keeping secret from
my prying eyes

lipstick on her table
beside a half cup o'coffee
and a pack of Kent cigarettes
her last change spent
with my priorities

wistful lines run her face
age impossible to define
sublime; her smile charms me
and I ask have you the time?

she turns round her shoulder
and she's older than I think
she drops a glance to her watch
sighs bout a half past six


Sunday, October 19, 2008

I Lied About Nine Thirty Five

the small of it's tonight I lied about how last night I called out your name
my fall was pride see I tried to but at your sight his only got in the way
from across a street in the midst of the city a little distance quaked into a great rift
and I suddenly didn't have any courage and all chance of the moment was missed

my eyes landed your hand in his and it looked like in your other you held a knife
that even though invisible sliced my enticement the time exactly nine thirty five
lacking discipline I looked back several steps beyond any retention of report
no abating thought able to ignore my inability to forget or let the past hold the score

but then tonight my smile a magnet you sat down beckoned by my tap and wry wave
to join me at an outside table with your lemon, honey hot water from the cafe
we stayed awhile then whilst you payed I finally found the will to tell you
how I felt then second guessed myself deciding best bet's let slip the truth

looking back starting up on a walk I know like the hand I often hold out
with a press resembling impressions important I realised I unfold to iron my doubt
it's known and seen well my presence at that table and you must know I wait
for you to pass by so I can slyly ask take a seat beside me cause here's the only place

I can take you or just talk to you and as most regulars know and feel here it's home
with the coffee and seasons and my swirling lack of reasons to want less for alone


Saturday, October 18, 2008

Wild Years

yeah, hehe.. sure we made hot love
to the length of a Tom Waits album
her arms around me straddling
with his wailing in the background
and what a sight to behold
getting our sex on to the Wild Years
well when she came I laughed 'cause
she sang just like backing vocals

lighting cigarettes on the roll off
we sighed o'er our wild years
questioned each other when it'll be
we decide it's time to grow up
for what to grow up's there gain
she whispered through the room's steam
I dunno I sleepily replied
seems more than enough right here


Friday, October 17, 2008

The Presence Of Love

lover's giving presents always starts out
wondering with newness nervous doubt
will they depart because of this gesture
or for the greater let see how I get you...

gently untie the string she says
tentatively your gift lies within
you find a dark blue tie pin gun
once opened more likely a broach

a weapon juxtaposed with a dove
wrapped square and tidy in colour
the soft shade just a little lighter
than that of the clear spring sky

your disliking of surprise dies
remembering in jest you requested
to own a colt forty-five revolver
wholly since such nature's cool

but in the present received you got
from her much more a symbol of what
obviously her interest upholds true
and a package with less obligatory dues

the cut of the felt where stapled
stays this symbol is jagged yet clean
and nimble appears the intent
which clear by the time and effort says

mine; dearer you grow by the day
finer as nearer our decisions show
that what begun as merely playful
has sprung a love I'm rearing to own


You're A Coward For Words

you tell her I have to let you go
'cause you're a coward to forwardly ask
you can't string the words it's over
'cause you can't bare to see her cry last

in exit you stride so shackled to guilt
pretending this was the obvious course
ending your time because only to've built
remorse for lending your lifeline seems coarse

her desire tires you for further absence
of your requiting, despite more of your trying
hoping to move past the sight of you and her
on the last desperate night you spent together


Wednesday, October 15, 2008

What Common Denominator?

I always imagined you and I finally together
one day, but lately it seems this way's better
we're not dissimilar, yet not familiar enough
to ever work friends beyond towards lovers

now I can sure say in more than a decade
more than's ordinarily fair; I've contemplated
for and of my share of fairytale endings
I've written away with many false pretendings

when you meet me after nine months passed
and ask of me how's life been of the last
I stutter to answer thinking so odd this request
that I mutter some jargon, hiding what I'd like to confess

discussion's ripe for picking out the patterns
of life's taking our paths too separate actions
tracking through where and who've we've been
exclaiming our aims changed for how we'd seen

now I deem coffee our common denominator
allowed; you round out and away any promanation
of relation once this moment's dissipated
ache made part of my diet, so in stride I take it

remorse a course poured down my conscience
out on the walk towards your car from this
talk about our worlds orbit's let collide and
the fork ahead in the road where you veer left, I right


Tuesday, October 14, 2008

The Weight Of A Piece Of Paper

to love of public statement
pray tell, say I do, try I will

bond you and I with paper
like mâché glues a statue
but the paper only takes
so much weight before it caves
then resignation makes
the gorge seem possibly a pinhole

and to slip through sits a mirror
in mixed reflections set appear
like sections of a diamond
sight gets only fragments
the whole picture unclear
till pink; for fear the ring sears


Love Knows No Long Distance

your call drops in
your story this...

from long distance
fortnightly flights
back and forth such
a tried plight of love

worth measuring

by time spent alone
Sydney's city drone
welcomes you home

Jetstar aircraft

timetables familiar
you quote by rote
the charts you know,
what waiting chalks
for toll and talk like
you've sought out all;
possibilities to make work
a love that ten hours
separation makes hurt

finally time catches

surprising none
by the cuff of your neck
what love has done

beckoned to Byron

one worth keeping told
sold on chance for risk
holding wide open

disconnect my phone

I'm over being alone
moving on, moving in
with him and all me within
will carry for short
life is and one ought
take no loss as hinder
at new beginnings

...disconnect complete


Sunday, October 12, 2008

Let's Hope It Lasts

under the tone of your breath
when he's left in a whisper you mention
...well let's hope it lasts
in reference to his new relation

sighing, your exclaim it
holds up with most as best intentions
but it's a saying that right away
slices like a scalpel
dissecting finely, painstaking
in what it tries to define

what a bind like detention
the common misconception of thinking
that to dissipate denotes less great
or a waste of time

debate's open on whether the weight
of importance rests on length
alternatively, point of argue would be
there's no quantifying till it's ceased


Saturday, October 11, 2008

How You Get In My Head When Drunk

you still pop into my head when drunk
lets mention my regret
of letting you go without you surely knowing
true enough what I'd do to get you back

in fact it's pending; my wondering
where you're at now and what you're doing and why
for all my trying you were still so hesitant
for ensuing you and I

it's funny what love does to a man
when it lies between his chest less than his legs
intoxication requires this be goodnight
but prevents it being goodbye


The Heat Of The Moment

in the heat even my fingers
sweat holding my cigarette

unfolding feelings like no less
inhalation will help me forget

but at best bet reduced remembering
is all I know to expect

when I step by the place
where I recall the moment we first met


memory's a trigger for a bullet
ripping through me pulling

my head down my throat then out
my chest with full force

at a speed with sharp surprise
that by regret's course sighs

until I pass by and find
you're not there to any further endorse


expansion of the guilt which,
like a snail shell fits my back

that I carry 'round as a home
leaving silvery sadness tracks

that though I don't turn to see
I know lead right back to you

and a truth I tried to make a lie
but now rue for being inexact


Friday, October 10, 2008

You Don't Wear Your Wedding Ring?

it lingers in my thoughts; you won't wear your wedding ring anymore
not that you don't love him but the care outweighs what you adore
passion's lacking quantity and romantic quality's long beyond forlorn
patterns of satisfaction replaced by lust for separation leaves you torn

your made face bares two pairs of glasses hiding your pretty eyes
sun ones to shield the light, the others prescribed to distort the lies
married seventeen years; you seem tired, left in wonder at now why
you ever took up the misused institution, like if not your heart'd go to trial

sighing, perhaps you were misguided or too young to understand time's tax
you say goodbye, confiding your thoughts find it's a barbed wired binding lapse



Wednesday, October 8, 2008

We Didn't Fit From The Beginning

she said to me you've tried to fit us before
but you can't ignore that we're different shapes
it takes more than bending words to persuade
any change in what for each other we'd be good for
debating our getting together again back 'n' forth
gets tiring when you know what we once sought
only ended up; me distraught and you getting taut
over the line, which we stretched 'til it broke
now stop stroking the past, like if you do it'll calm
'cause what's over is final any resumption'll only harm us


No Excavation Of Feelings From The Chase

in recollection of what I past called love
some query does now arise

furthermore, surprise now grabs at
what tries to crawl through my eyes

when I slip it lands upon your lips
for trying to quickly exit mine

I shift and turn in my sleep at it
thinking it just the catalyst of time

can due explanation be you make me feel
a little more than a bit alright

my self and world questioning dissolves
when the only answers landed are trite


love or wondering of; does one's mindset
an interesting twist and turn of events

it leads to excavation of what relations meant
and whether falling's possible to circumvent

there's no trying or pretending that you're less to me
than any other I've yet met

it's surreal how natural it is to forget
the liberty the chase extracts from your chest


To Say 'I Love You' Isn't Warranted

no words for the rising butterflies
beating up my stomach to pulp

no words to describe the lump
stuck in my throat I must gulp

no words for excitement like you impose
with your seductive touch

no words I can find seem right
or justified this soon enough

I'm trying to define the feelings
of you and I in this new beginning

yet the only instinct winning
I can't give you which makes this tough

to say I love you isn't warranted
but not for wanting to for ease

because what resolve is there for these actions
which, words for ideas just tease


Sunday, October 5, 2008

Whilst You Were Dreaming

arriving home I tip-toe to your room
the light's out, no sound just black
I twist the handle trying to be quiet
and push the door slightly open a crack

I turn on the light to watch you sleep
listening to your breathing; heavy
my intoxicated instinct is weakened
and I climb into the bed with you

lifting carefully, gently the covers off
you don't stir but you turn to face me
your arm drapes unconsciously, slowly across
and you moan softly deep in sleep

I study your eyes closed, lips pursed
I lie for what seems an hour or two
and sigh at the beauty of you dreaming
before falling asleep beside you


Maturity Sees The Glue The Past

they went their separate ways both saying and fully owning
the relationship they'd so long known; no further more now owing
either of them any moment of consideration to wrong decision
implicit in their moving on was two years wisdom's vision

I spoke at length to both of them; debating time and regret
and what struck me as lucky was their agreement to not forget
the meaning of their love or the learning curve walked together
and the contemplation of other relations, yet not saying no to one day forever

moving forward neither's looking back with any conclusion but at last
have I come to understand what love takes when the glue becomes the past
it's beautiful the maturity rendered by mutual feelings so oddly spoken
and whilst leaning towards different futures each to the other's given hope


Saturday, October 4, 2008

Tattoo Two

let me show you what you've done to me
this tattoo's a wound that'll never heal
it bleeds until the ink's all stained through
the depths of the epidermis and seals

for life this writing'll tell our tale
reminding myself of the pain you dealt
out hot-handedly and so nonchalantly
that it boiled my tears and all I'd felt

when vapour was all left I had to lay down
an only offering of my misty steamed heart
you didn't let condense any of my intent
just let the wind take my essence and depart


You're Billboard Boyfriend Material

brother you're boyfriend material
that's what the girls are seein' and sayin'
whether you're serious or just playin'
their heart's in it for doomsdayin'

your potential's written like a billboard
in your vocabulary and dress
which's why they find they don't want any less
than your exclusive attention

your road's towards hands holding
there's no pretending otherwise
see, I know you've been trying love on
and now limited interest for size

but it's contrived your efforts to forget
the mechanics of your past love life
fact is: time's a spanner justifying
what history de-tunes until finally

resignation's removed from gripe


Friday, October 3, 2008

Spare Empty Chair

tonight; tired of hiding I decidedly told her
that which, in my imagination lies imposed
by coincidence, some random chance I met her out
I was standing at the cafe; waiting in head phones

she paced; rugged up in a red woolen coat
and though I hadn't smoked yet tonight
I still felt a hoarse lump climb up my throat
remembering what I wrote last of her to describe

as she slid into a seat; at a table reserved
patiently, I deliberately let her get settled there
before taking up stride with my late courage
to request sharing her company and the spare chair

as always has been our time knew no silence
both of us reciting of our daily lives with ease
until I finally decided to show her my poem
and let know I've been writing about her with no cease

as I watched her eyes read the lines on the screen
the glow of the poem showing my efforts to redeem
her charming smile was all required to disarm my need
further freed hearing in her breath closure's relief

I payed for my coffee and left her a kiss by her cheek
I stood offering my embrace, aware of the regret which I reeked
I could tell she sought in my eyes a final caution to my feelings
but I just stared at our empty chairs; emotions unrevealed

pacing the steps away it occurred me what I signed in red
with my lips and my heart I'd weighed down my soul
this penalty - my fancy of her; a ballast heavier than lead
has pulled my head into my chest to pay the toll


other people waiting

we're not strangers anymore