If Dreams Could Redeem

I can't remember when I last felt this way
when or if I ever wanted someone so near
it's unclear but it may be that I never did
that I never let myself want anyone so dear
but now a night ends slowly and so it hurts
to not feel the hours pass quickly with you
I hear the clicking of the clock from my bed
as lying awake in the still night is all I can do
I choke on the silence that fills the room
and cigarette smoke stains all my senses
I think of tomorrow and what I might want
until I'm indecisive but for you and the past tense
will you be a lover that I sleep with forever
set to seep through the echoes of my dream
will I one day look back and wonder if I did
everything to leave me nothing to redeem